Funny Story
A Tale of Homemade Cayenne and Red Pepper Flakes
There is a man, in a house, in The Farm, that loves a pepper bush. It’s his pride and joy.
Well, I guess he just loves peppers in general.
This man loves his pepper bush so much that he made a necklace of all the peppers that came off of it during the long hot Summer and hung them to dry.
At night, all he would dream of was the beautiful peppers that abundantly grew. He carefully picked and separated all the good from the bad.
He made sure to make the “necklace” of only the strongest fishing wire that would surely stay strong all Summer long.
One day, his loving, sweet, clumsy wife decided to surprise the man and turn his beautifully dried peppers into something that would last much longer than the peppers ever could.
She decided to make his peppers into Ground Cayenne Peppers.
So, the good wife threw caution to the wind and picked up the dried peppers (without gloves) like a boss, pinching them one by one, and throwing them into the food processor.
What the good wife DIDN’T know was that even though the skins ground up beautifully, the seeds would not, NO MATTER HOW LONG she processed them.
So!
Being the smart wife she was, she decided to remove the lid of the processor…………. only to be met by an invisible cloud of festering fire! The kind that starts inconspicuously in your nostrils and then quickly moves to your sinuses and before you know it, turns your body into a rage of sneezing convulsions.
PLAN B! , she thought!
Once her body stopped spasming from the uncontrollable sneezing, she regrouped and went to the store to buy a Pestle and Mortar set. She had always wanted one and this may just be the perfect opportunity!
When the good wife returned home, she braved the concoction yet once again. Armed with her new tool,
she thought surely it would work this time………
The good wife’s optimism was only met with disappointment when she realized that the seeds would not grind up with the Pestle and Mortar set either.
PLAN C, she thought!
What better gift …………. than that of not one, but two gifts!
So!
It was then and only then when she was faced with yet another obstacle, that she truly found what she was supposed to do all along.
The good wife decided to give the man Dried Red Pepper Flakes and Ground Cayenne Pepper.
The Red Pepper Flakes were abundant!
The Ground Cayenne Pepper?………………….. Not so much.
No worries though. The wife was very happy.
And the man?
Well, the man was very grateful.
If! And only if you are truly brave, proceed to the recipe below:
And just so you know, it wouldn’t hurt to wear a mask……. or two! LOL!
Recipe: Homemade Ground Cayenne Pepper and Red Pepper Flakes
– Dried Peppers from Cayenne Pepper Bush
– Teaspoon Salt
Directions:
– Pinch stems off tops of dried peppers and add to a Food Processor or Pestle and Mortar. Add salt and process or grind until you reach desired consistency.
– Separate flakes from ground cayenne by using a sifter.
– Store in an air tight container.
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